Ronald P. T. Malone

yo yo yo Pacifica Typhoon comin’ atcha

catch this - lil soap opera we call Dogtown, episode fucktillion and two, a real tearjerker:

word on the street is, Kerry Eurodyne’s holed up in the Stacks with a couple of lovers. my first question's like - why the fuck’s he here when he got that preem-ass North Oak mansion, right? he wanna feel the danger, feel alive or somethin’? i mean different strokes for diffrent folks, no shame, man, but come on i’m just theorizin now but I feel like u want that orgy to go down in some ganic sheets, not in some old container on the streets. I mean, that’s what ol’ Ronnie would do. theoretically.
Anywho, got the whole Stacks flooded with gonks turnin’ the place upside down lookin for the guy. Chrissakes...

Ayeah choom like, s’all the same to me right, but I don’t get why peeps are out here fuckin’ peepin’ on him. like damn, if it’s true give the guy some space...

Bexactly, gonks be out here pokin’ their noses where they don’t belong, and it’s all smellin like bullshit anyways. but sure, let ‘em do what they wanna do, maybe they need a distraction or somethin.

anyways. I run into him I’ll send you a pic, maybe grab an autograph too hahahaha

yo check this:

heard those A guys and M guys are doin some sorta experimentin on peeps in the bunkers under Dogtown. pay’s pretty good, apparently, but you don’t sign up, they come to you. sounds fishy, right?
either way shit’s wild, that’d be some historic cooperation, bridgin’ of differences, y’know? prolly for some shit like the good of all mankind... with us dtown peeps as the guinea pigs. nah, nope, no way. me, I’m thinkin’ it’s some pharmaceutical quacks this time. like, choom of a choom ain’t got up for ten days, they reset his motor functions to check somethin’ and just left the poor gonk.

and then ol’ Ronnie here’s gotta go around Dtown settin’ the streets straight... I’m off to spread a word of warnin’. can’t never catch a break...

sup V, hot off the streets

this time, in culture and entertainment:

ya know them new dtown BDs? ones where some choom meditates at night in some dilapidated buildin’ or bunker or alley or some shit? heard they started shippin’ em to Europe, scrolls’re sellin’ like hotcakes. and you thought that was wild? apparently Hansen’s the one scrollin’ ‘em! big bossman is out there makin’ anonymous altBDs. shit’s crazy, huh? wonder if anyone can confirm it. still, adds a lil spice to them scrolls, huh?

Anah man, street’re fresh out. heard the whole batch went to Europe.

Bchoooom talk about a cast! but shit, I mean, everyone’s gotta have a hobby or somethin’.

anywho, if your boy Ronnie spots anythin’ on the market, I’ll let you know. might be worth investin’... these days any ol’ bullshit could turn cult fave.

NEVER GONNA BELIEVE THIS, V
NOPE NEVER SHIT’S WILD

so there’s this choom, Vance, had some sorta stroke or fit or somethin in this haunted run-down buildin’ right? and ever since the choom’s been spoutin some shit like he’s got visions or whatever. and WAIT FOR IT: one day he tells his peeps to go down in the bunkers and tear down a few walls cause, like, the vision’s ain’t that precise, but ANYWAY what did they find? a fuckin’ mammoth tusk!!! and Vance was like oh shit, now everybody and they moms gonna be up in here asking what else I see, so he runs off with the tusk, but honest to god my choom was one of the peeps diggin there and it’s true, they really found somethin’ down there.

got me thinkin if Vance had like, a vision of them finding his dead body or somethin'... you ask ol’ Ronnie, choom was right, if you’re clairvoyant you best go solo and keep your mouth shut.

shit got a customer, peace out

yo wanna hear the latest word on the street?

gonna be some sorta ruckus with the VDBs. heard they’re armin’ up, gettin’ ready for war. like, peeps’re sayin they got some underground factory where they’re buildin’ robots and clones and shit so they can rise up against Hansen. man I’d write it off as the usual bullshit, but I got a choom I trust sayin’ a NetWatch agent’s been hangin’ around. and choom if there’s NetWatch, there’s trouble... and maybe some truth to the talk?

Awho knows, choom, depends how pissed off they are

Bol’ Ronnie’s seen stupider suicide ops. if you got somethin’ to prove, that means you think you’re fighting for what’s right, and ain’t that all you need? shit, for the right cause it’s worth pokin’ holes in any system. Maybe his majesty’ll at least feel somethin’ bite him in the ass?

guess we gotta wait and see. but your boy’s lookin’ out for the revolution, baby!

somebody oughta give ol’ Ronnie a pulitzer for this one – except I ain’t in the mood to write it all down proper...

get this, the scavs are tryna bring back dinosaurs over there in organitopia. DINOS, V. hope its triceratops, love those lil fuckers.
but seriously, the scavs had worse ideas, so who knows? fingers crossed they actually pull off this hairbrained scheme, huh? triceratops be nova as fuck
and fuckin picture this: once they got that triceratops, they start sellin’ tickets to go see the lil guy. and then the whole fuckin world comes in to see it! talkin millions, BILLIONS of eddies pourin into the hood here. revitalizing and shit. fuck, ol’ Ronnie’s got some dust in his eye just thinkin’ about it.

Aman, who knows what’s possible in this day an’ age? ya ask me, ain’t nothin’ outta reach.

Bo shit choom, we can feed ‘im together!

later triceragator

yo V! N54 News told me to kick rocks, so looks like you’re all the audience I got:

JUST DONT SAY YOU GOT IT FROM ME. so there’s this Rinder goon in the Stacks, choom’s so whacked outta his damn mind he shot up a bunch of kids down there. peeps is sayin’ it’s gotta be cyberpsychosis or some cult shit or somethin... hard to say what’s worse, honestly. anyway, ol’ Ronnie’s gonna keep away from the choom, think you should too.

Atell me bout it. if the choom up and disappeared, nobody’d give half a shit. some might even raise a glass.

Byeah. bullet to the brain.

fingers crossed he fuckin gets whats comin to him

got somethin big here. shit, should be gettin’ paid for this!

all I gotta say is fuck the scavs, V. mean it. what sorta gonks take over a damn clinic? fuckin slime, that’s what. slimy ass scavs. anyway, you know Anderson, apparently he was in the clinic and had to make a deal with ‘em so the place could go back to biz. either that, or some miracle got ‘em out. my money’s on Anderson tho. wonderin what he promised the scum? dunno, but now I’m like, gonna think twice before goin’ over there. what if I gotta hand the scavs a kidney for gettin’ a tooth out, huh? shit, it’s like, all good but not all good, ya feel me?

Ayeah you prolly right. meanin, hippocrates wouldn’t make a deal like that, huh? anywho, just askin’ around before I head over there. gotta look out for numero uno, ya know?

Bhah, that’s the kind I like. nothin’ but biz, nothin’ but results. anywho, just askin’ around before I head over there. gotta look out for numero uno, ya know?

anywho, keep chillin like a villain, peace

hey V, bad news in the hood

so that Anderson choom, y'know, Haven Clinic guy? welp now the choom's dead and it's Odell's clinic. Odell ain't sayin much, but apparently somethin' real went down with the scavs. now we got all sortsa theories poppin' up, like what sorta deals Anderson made with that scavscop, like maybe he would tip 'em off 'bout some valuable loot, or maybe he refused to tip 'em off and they got tired of askin'. like maybe the choom couldn't be bought, so the scavs got rid of him to make room for one of their own, or like maybe he started askin' for more eddies or somethin'. like, maybe he was sellin' 'em meds on the sly, or maybe they just wanted to klep him dry and he got wiped protecting his shit, or like maybe even Odell sold him out. I mean damn, no matter what you say there's a choom in dtown who'll buy you a broseph for tellin' it like it is. but facts is facts - we had a doc in the house and now we don't. shit.

Alike everywhere else. cept here, nobody bothers to hide it

Bnah, c'mon. we're fucked, choom.

anywho, guess we'll see, but it sure don't look good